q and a

Harassment

If someone was being bullied at school and they needed someone to talk to, who do they talk to?

Thanks for your question. I wish I knew more about what was going on for you. I'm wondering if you are asking this because you feel you are being bullied. That can be a very upsetting and difficult situation to be in. Talking to people about this is very important; you don't have to go through it alone. Bullying is abusive and it's not ok for people to be doing this to others. Bully's behaviours are about them and their issues and not about the person they are targeting. Talking to adults you can trust is a good strategy; perhaps parents, other family members or even teachers. The school counsellor can be a good person to go to for support, as well as helping on a school level. Calling the Kids Help Line (free call: 1800 55 1800) can also be a helpful, 24/7 support in this type of situation. Hope this helps. Have a look a the links below for more help and ideas. The above information has been reproduced from Somazone with permission from the Australian Drug Foundation. www.somazone.com.au Australian Drug Foundation 2009

I'm not really sure what this is, but it makes me feel uncomfortable. I play clarinet. My music teacher makes me feel uncomfortable. Earlier in the year he would poke me in the lower back to get me to sit up instead of just saying "sit up". The last time he did it I pushed his hand away. He hasn't done it since. I've recently started playing the bassoon. I was on work experience for the last week, so he dropped it off where my mum works. Then on the holidays, he called me "to ask how things were going". I really didn't like knowing that he had my number. I know that all my teachers have access to my number on file, but it was the holidays. I don't feel comfortable talking about it with any of my teachers or my parents because if I do, I'm afraid that they won't believe me. And even if they do, then they might talk to him about it and he'll know that I said something, and I don't want to get treated differently because I really enjoy music. What do I do????

Thanks for your question. You have a right to feel uncomfortable about this situation with your music teacher. It can be confusing when things like this happen - we know something is going on but it can be hard to identify exactly what it is. However, I'm glad that you are in touch with your feelings and it's important to listen to them. For him to touch you in any way or to ring you at home is inappropriate in his position as your teacher. There are boundaries between teacher and student that should never be crossed. I know you are reluctant to talk about this with your family or teachers. I can understand that these things aren't easy to talk about, however I'd like you to reconsider talking about this though, because you have done absolutely nothing wrong in this situation. His behaviours are his problem; it's not about you or anything you have done. However, his behaviours are affecting you and you don't need to feel this way. Why would you feel that your parents wouldn't believe you? You don't need to be carrying this stuff around with you. Remember that you have not created this problem. That's why parents and teachers we can trust are there for us. Sharing exactly how you feel - just like you have done here on Somazone - is important for you to feel better and supported in this situation. You can work with them to come up with a solution that is more comfortable for you. Take care of yourself.The above information has been reproduced from Somazone with permission from the Australian Drug Foundation. www.somazone.com.au Australian Drug Foundation 2009

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